It's the most wonderful time of the year...for some more than others

Crying is Unattractive For Most People...
...including my youngest brother, Adrian.
We wake up, all of us. Christmas morning and there's just something in the air that just delights everyone, a delirium, if you will,  and makes all the bad things fade. We scamper towards the tree. The pitter-patter of feet hitting the linoleum of our hallway. Wrapping paper is a-flying every which-way. One could sink into this kind of blissful rhapsody.
Our presents were nice; they tended to what we desired, as they should. But a certain, Mr. Adrian, finds manages to find something of which he finds unsatisfactory. He had received his presents, yet he still searches underneath the tree for more. He finds his name is no longer mingling around the likes of the other gifts and, quite suddenly, starts to shut down. Tears begin to stream from his face like rain in my gutter on a stormy April mid-morning. He is not pleased. My family begins to ask of the matter, to which he responded sullenly, " I didn't get EVERYTHING I wanted." My mother, now shocked from his response, asks, "but isn't it enough what you have?" He shifts in his seat, his eye like a dagger, his whole face frozen in utter despisal and says in a way that mimics Cousin Mel from Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer," Enough is NEVER enough!" He slowly picks up his person, face still in the wrinkly wet form it was but a moment ago, and escapes to the sanctuary of his room,to the temple of his Cars bed, taking the horrid mournful cries of supposed torture with him, left to sulk in this newly found abasement he had encountered on this so-called "Merry" day.
                                                                    -Guess who's on the Naughty List..
                                                                                          A. 

Acceptance Letter: Yale: The Crest can't get any smaller

Yale University New Haven, Connecticut 06520   Office of Undergraduate Admissions            
           
                      
 Dearest A...,
Congratulations on your admittance at Yale University, Class of 2017! We hope that you are alright with our informal greeting, we realize that this letter does not possess a tasteful thickness nor a watermark. Even so, we would like to extend to you a welcoming hand to our fine institution.

Allow me, personally, the pleasure of addressing, that your complete resume was simply phenomenal; so much so that it moved me to tears. You don't see many young women your age putting aside their own personal desires to assist in the warding off of the war in Uganda. God bless you. I especially enjoyed reading about your recent escapades to Burma, commonly known today as Myanmar. The stories you included were some of which I  can see published in a book of short tales, a book of which grandparents would engage in reading to their grandchildren by the fireplace on Christmas Eve for centuries to come. It possessed both the qualities of child-like whimsy we read in Roald Dahl, and the true spirit and triumph of the American Dream we hear in Conway Twitty; tasteful and sophisticated, yet ruthless. You are ,in fact, the pinnacle of a runaway American Dream. Let me just say that ,on behalf of the institution, we are honored that a personal friend of the Dalai Lama, the protégé of the legendary Andy Warhol, the mentor of Barbara Walters and the next heir to the Romanoff throne would even consider our humble establishment among many other options. Thank you.

We hope you enjoy your time here at Yale, and that later on you don’t end up transferring to Columbia. You cannot begin to fathom the devastation since the Waldorf incident -a truly dark day in the history of Yale- [ also the idea that Ms. Watson chose to go to Brown, is completely beyond me]. We encourage you to make the right choice and the choice that would be socially acceptable among your elite inner circle. Also, while you’re here, I strongly encourage you go out for our rowing team.

We look forward to hopefully seeing you on campus. We have a feeling that while you’re here, you will be the one to teach us something. Welcome to Yale!

Babe of the Week

Drastic Times Call for Drastic Measures: A Tribute to Jessicahh.

I, personally, don't find Tim Tebow attractive, whatsoever. After being constantly badgered by "Jessicahh," I simply could deal with it no longer. I had no choice but to succumb to her whim. This is the reason why the Babe of the Week isn't someone undeniably gorgeous, eloquent, and charismatic but rather the caveman Jesus-freak, Tim Tebow. Maybe, in a certain light, he could be considered somewhat attractive. Maybe if you have a fetish with neanderthals.Maybe if you're into caveman-lookin' mofos. Maybe if you adore the way his neck and head carry on the same diameter. Maybe if you don't mind how annoying it is having to wait for him to finish praying after every damn point is scored [this is no offense to others who follow the word of the lord. I mean no disrespect; he's a good guy. Although I'd find it more suitable as to pray before or after a game, that'd be nice, but apparently he finds it joyous as to waste people's time -"ain't nobody got time fo' dat"] I guess he could be cute to some people. If  Tom Hardy had an affair with an anteater, you would get Tim Tebow. He's not really my type. I'm sure he's very nice, though. Kudos, Tim, you got lucky.
                       -He's a solid 2/3 of a Babe.
                         The Council of Babes

The Overwhelming Sense of Ecstasy and Joy That Comes With the Holidays: The Reservoir of My Tears.

The Following are Recent Pre-Christmas Gifts Given to Me By My Ever-Adoring Peers. Merci Beaucoup.

A special thanks to all my dear friends. You are all everlasting jovial mementos; stains, that which cloud the occipital region of my cranium, never to be removed from my remembrance.They were worth every tear I shed. Also, kudos on the Leo movies, and great timing, too [Leo.D being the Babe of the Week last week.]

Babe of the Week

God forbid he obtains anymore allure.

For those of you who have lost hope in   the physical appearance of Leo being somewhat admirable, shame on you! If I could, I would cast plagues upon all of your Leo-forsaking houses. Shame on you for you are no better than a modern-day Victor Frankenstein. I, however, have not forsaken him. I have not given up hope, and do you know why? Simply because he is the epitome of a 21st century Eros. He is and will always be a Double Babe, regardless of what he looks like. The picture here is from his latest movie The Great Gatsby -which was supposed to be released in December of this year but will now be released in the summer of 2013. He has, once again, collaborated with the amazing Baz Luhrman, the writer and director of the movie and of 2 of my favorite movies; Romeo+Juliet [which starred Leo as Romeo Montague] and Moulin Rouge. In this movie we get a sense of the Leo that once was:baby-smooth,evenly-tanned and stubble/facial hair-free skin, as soft as my plush teal Northface, golden blonde locks of Pantene-inspired ecstasy and bright blue eyes that shimmer like limpid pools of serene babbling brooks that a mediocre Poseidon would scorn in envy. Even so, the physical aspect of Leo should remain just a perk in the movies he takes part in. He is a true artist in his work; passionate and believable, both of which are traits forgotten by many of today's sad excuses for actors/actresses. Who can forget his role as Frank Wheeler in Revolutionary Road, or his incredible performance as Romeo Montague in 1996's modern-day version of Romeo+Juliet, or extremely moving portrayal of a mentally-ill Arnie Grape in What's Eating Gilbert Grape which gave him a well-deserved nomination for an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor but, unfortunately, wasn't enough to earn him the win. He is the most underrated actor of his time, our time, all time. Only a mere 3 nominations for Academy Awards, but no gold. He lives in Oscar-Squalor. What will it take for Leo to get some damn recognition?! What about Leo?! I'm sure one day he'll have his time in the well-deserved spotlight, yes, one day. Until then, kudos for now, Leo.
                         -I'll never let go, Leo.
                                 The Council of Babes.

Babe of the Week

Give Me Liberty Or Give Me Bale!

 It's pretty obvi that Christian Bale was bound to be Babe of the Week at some point [his name is the blog, duh]. Who can deny his place here? No one, absolutely no one. Although there have been stories; he's short-tempered, rude, overrated...violent, etc. etc. regardless of the possibility of these allegations being true, I simply do not give a damn. This man has the right to act as he pleases, he has earned it through his amazing work. From such diverse roles in his early career such as: Jamie Graham in Empire of the Sun, Demetrius in  A Midsummer Night's Dream, Arthur Stuart in Velvet Goldmine, and the infamous Patrick Bateman in American Psycho, to the more recognizable roles such as: Alfred Borden in The Prestige, Dicky Eklund in The Fighter [a role where he earned himself an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor] and, of course, Bruce Wayne in the latest Batman movies. He is ridiculously close to a Double Babe [refer to The Babe Graph], all because of his remarkable talent as an actor... and, of course, he's absolutely gorgeous. The man has the bone structure of an angular John Stamos, the thick lustrous hair of Michael Bolton, the smooth evenly-tanned skin of a Brazilian Tina Fey, the tastefully hairy arms of a 45 year-old Italian woman, and, let's not forget, the ability to grow glossy facial hair that would put Sir Dumbledore to shame. Kudos, Bale.
               -I hope you don't mind that I put down in words, how wonderful life is while you're in the world.

                                           The Council of Babes.

The Babe Scale