T'is the Season to Be Jolly...if You're a Capitalist

The Marlon Brando of Our Generation.

Be not misconstrued be his humble presence alongside the notorious John F. Kennedy; he is but a mere nobleman. You may recognize him, if not by his real name then by his artist name, Pintar Byzantii. He did, in fact, design Martha's Stewart's wine cellar.  Maybe you've seen him lurking around charity functions, or perhaps the Guggenheim for Donald Trump's Birthday Gala? Still not ringing a bell? Maybe you've met his mother, you can often find her shopping at Saks Fifth Avenue. Maybe you remember him from your college days; he was the guy who transferred from Yale to Columbia; oh, the deception, the betrayal. He's well acquainted with the royals, both Great Britain and Genovia. Maybe you've recognized his face from televised showings of the latest scandals; Lindsay Lohan's crazy soiree, or perhaps partying with Prince Harry. He rowed crew  at Yale, you know, until he transferred. I'm sure you heard, he's part of Marie Antoinette's bloodline, he brags about it constantly. He got a Maserati for his 16th birthday and sent it back because his name wasn't monogrammed on the leather seating. I'm sure you've met him, he's on that gossip site constantly [ oh what's the name? I think it was Gossip Girl...]. He only eats medium well-done steak; do not test him on this, he will send it back. He's next in line for the Romanoff throne. I'm sure you know who I'm talking about now.
                                          -He's not a very generous tipper, either
                                                                   A.

Babe of the Week

I'm drowning in the Levitt...and I don't want to be saved!

Are there enough words in the world to describe the babe that is Joseph Gordon-Levitt? Articulate, funny, and just simply adorbs; the list of pros for this runaway American dream goes on...and on. This hunk-a-burnin'-love has made ladies swoon in movie theaters and at their television sets from his humble beginnings in 3rd Rock from the Sun and Angels in the Outfield, to heart-warming films such as 500 Days of Summer and 50/50, and the recent, buzz-worthy thrillers like Inception and Loopers. One cannot deny, JGL makes you wanna save the town of Gotham from certain havoc for an extended amount of time and give up your nighttime vigilante alias, in hopes that maybe he'll show up to your door and beg you to come back because not only does Gotham need you, he, too, needs you. He makes you wanna risk your newly found career as a therapist for cancer patients for a chance at possibly starting a relationship with one of your ridiculously adorable, yet depressed and partially dying, client, a spinal cancer-stricken JGL. He makes you think, like anything's possible, like life is worth it. Every time you think of them you think of a song.."She's like the wind.." In the simplest terms, and the most convenient definitions, he has reached a astounding Full Babe and A Half [that's a big deal] and that has landed him a spot as Babe of the Week on this humble blog. Kudos, JGL.
                           -Together we can live with the sadness, boy I love you with all the madness in my soul.
                                     The Council of Babes

The Torment No One Should Endure

So I'm sitting here, in my Hispanic culture-inspired kitchen, blogging about the insufferable cries of the tortured 11 year-old soul that is my brother.
You see, he had received his test back from his teacher; it was a B+, nothing to stress about. His teacher -being the heartless and slovenly wench that she is- decides she needs the tests back and that her students must return them to her. My brother, now currently running rampant throughout the alleyways and crevices of the manor in search of that wretched test, is hysterical. The search for it now is pointless; yes, indeed, pointless like the pursuit towards the perfect government.There's no chance of it happening, it simply does not exist [like the limit].
I ask you, my audience, "Who would do such a thing?" Better yet, "Shouldn't the 'bitch' know for a fact that if you give a youngin back a [already graded, mind you] piece of past work, the chances are she won't ever get those back because the probability of them throwing them away or casting them aside exceeds that of actually keeping it substantially?" Does she expect us to sent out a search party for this piece of paper? Can a mere feuille de papier cause so much grief and torment in a simple household? Yes, apparently it can. It is a truly inconvenient truth that has reached not only its victim but those who live with him, as well.
He is not the same confident young man he was 24 hours ago. No, he's different. His steps are heavy with sorrow as he galumphs his way around the house. It is a never-ending sulking that masks his face, ridding it from all possible emotions. His body slumps over, like the shell of a hermit crab. He rejects his meals, for food cannot fill the empty void he feels in his heart nor can  it tear his mind away from the unreachable sheet of paper. All he can do now is accept his fate. What awaits for him tomorrow? He'll have to find out.
                                                -I should be helping him find it
                                                            Innocent Bystander.

Babe of the Week

Ryan Gosling? More like Ryan God-ling.

Congrats to the FIRST Babe of the Week ever, Sir Ryan Gosling, Duke of Gorg'! It seems lately all I've been talking about is Ryan Gosling; it's almost as if i have the Gosling plaque...and I welcome it! It is a sickness Tylenol can't even fix. The plague is contagious and women (and some men) seem to just not give a damn. Ryan Gosling is master of his domain and the domain of women (and some men) everywhere! His piercing blue eyes stop women/some men in their tracks. His head perceives the moderate circumference as that of Michaelangelo's David. His defined jawline has stolen my heart, and he can keep it -until next week- ! Aside from his obvious charm and boy-next-door allure, we must also think, "What else draws us to the Adonis they refer to as Ryan Gosling?" His career. He has established himself as a versatile actor, with roles from the obvious heartthrob of Noah in The Notebook to more sullen, yet still unbelievably charming, Dean [who was both able to steal our hearts then crush it later on]  in Blue Valentine -which is probably one of the best movies last year had to offer-. Overall, Gosling seems to have it all going for him. Kudos, Gos.
                                     -To die by his side is such a heavenly way to die.
                                              The Council of Babes.

The Loss of the One They Call, Mc-Lil' Kim..

She comes and goes like the wind through the valley of deciet, ever-longing betrayal.
She leaves her "work family," her league, if you will, with the ease of a small babe.Why
She chooses to leave us, we'll never know.
Her memory stains the occipital part of our minds like blood stains sheets of Egyptian Cotton.
She is nothing but a memory now, a mere remnant or recollection of what once was.
She comes and goes as she wishes, and looks upon whate'er she favors.
She is the lord of the manor, she can easily cast us aside if she so wishes, like peasants/plebians and
Her wish is our bidding.

                    -Poetry comes strong to the broken-hearted.
                       Where are you Mc-Lil' Kim?
                      

Am I the only one?

It t'was but the radius of his Spanish face. The centripetal force that caught my eye each time I looked at him. It's nothing but a memory now; a memory of a man... more so a boy; a man-boy caught up with his own insecurities in this world so pent up with beauty. In this world so focused on "imperfections" of one's body than the imperfections of their oppressive and egotistical government. A capitalist world.

Am I the only one...
who misses Enrique Iglesias's mole? Do people even recall the Enrique of the past? The man who wrote love ballads, instead of dance mixes alongside Pitbull. Who wrote about the very essence of chivalry, instead of his relations with various precocious women. The man who we would not expect to carry a venereal disease in the past, in the times of his mole, since he had once dedicated his life to love, yet now it seems to be the complete opposite. You can't seem to walk into a club/ bar without coming across Enrique, his undressed attire, horrid trucker hat, and a slew, or clan, of whorish venereal disease-carrying ladies of the night.  Have you all simply cast aside the very memory of his beauty mark as well as you would cast aside scandals in our politics. Sure, they happen frequently, but does that make them any less wrong? Eliot Spitzter was gross. God help Bill Clinton. Herman Cain needs help. So does Tiger Woods. Anyway, the mole. Ah yes, the mole. The very core of the apple that is Enrique Iglesias, or, at least, was. T'was but the root of all that was this astounding, latin stallion. Women, even I, swooned over this mole. His mole was my hero, baby...and it damned-well took my breath away, too. Why Enrique? Why? Why is it so unacceptable as to live with the body you were born with? Were you not satisfied by your everyday visage? What would lead you to even consider the idea of removing your mark of beauty, your gift from the gods? Would "Hero" have been big without the mole? Is it socially acceptable to wear white after Labor Day when, in fact, EVERYDAY excluding Labor Day, is technically, AFTER Labor Day. I guess there are just some questions that can never be answered.

                                            Mourning the loss of my hero
                                                 - A.

Matt Bomer: too babe for words...well maybe some words.

So I've recently started watching the show White Collar..
Let me just say, it's a lot like Catch Me If You Can ..like a lot except everybody looks ten times better, even the main character Neal Caffrey (played by the ever-delicious, yet sadly[to the female gender] gay, Matt Bomer), who is supposed to be playing the allegory of DiCaprio's character (Frank Abagnale Jr.). The show is 'aight, although you have to watch each episode twice in order to get what the heck their talking about, due to the fact that Matt Bomer's face is what inspired the Ken Dolls, Michaelangelo's David, every boy band known to girl (I'm talking New Kids On The Block, N'Sync, 98 Degrees, and the Backstreet Boys with a dash of Blink 182) and Greek/Roman gods all together. He truly is an Adonis. The show is missing something, though. Maybe a stronger plot line? Maybe more Bomer shirtless scenes? I don't know, I'm not a writer.
                                                  -Girl, Interrupted...by Matt Bomer's godlike features.

A sad response to capitalism.

Greetings,
     The news i have to bring is scarce, so I will make this short and sweet. I don't know if i will be the sort of person to lash out on the internet every time i don't agree with something. I don't think I have the seniority to do that, yet. At this very moment, I feel excruciatingly lazy as to type with correct spelling and somewhat correct grammar, but having come from the dangerous streets of the place they call "Literacy Workshop" and working my way to the top of the English pyramid has taught me something; Literacy Workshop is totally underrated (they made us read Frankenstein AND A Raisin in the Sun), James Van Der Beek is a total babe, and if I weren't writing with the skills i have acquired, not only would I be lying to myself, but I would also be succumbing to neanderthal lifestyle, and I am not about that life.

                                                 -Your friendly neighborhood, Batman.